Escaping the Noise: Loneliness, Connection, and the Outdoors

I've been in an introspective mood today. Last year, I wrote about Summertime Sadness—and now, with this sudden burst of warm weather, I find myself in a familiar headspace. The sunshine has arrived, bringing with it a massive pollen count and the dreaded fear of missing out (FOMO).

I recently met up with a friend and took a walk in the Yorkshire Dales. It was a beautiful day—blue skies, fresh air, the kind of weather that makes people rush to beer gardens or fire up the BBQ. But honestly? I almost didn’t go. You know that feeling when you're stuck in a motivational slump, but deep down, you know that once you get moving, you'll be glad you did? That was me today. I knew that some time in nature would do me good and I started to think, “hmmm, maybe there is something to this whole outdoors thing.”

Loneliness, Connection, and “Digital Detox”

On our walk, my friend and I had one of those deep conversations—the kind that happen when you’ve not seen each other for some time and think you’re both experts when really, you’re not. We talked about loneliness, a topic that worries me as a therapist. Men’s loneliness has been heavily discussed lately, and for good reason. The numbers are concerning, and the impact is real.

What struck me, though, was how being off-grid felt surprisingly calm. No phone signal, no distractions—just miles of woodland, the occasional birdcall, and a feeling of presence that’s rare in everyday life. It was a reminder that sometimes, escaping the noise (both digital and mental) is exactly what we need.

Alone or Lonely?

While walking through alongside Malham Tarn, my friend said something that stuck with me:

"You never feel lonely when you're in nature."

In an age where self-improvement dominate social media—morning sunlight rituals, meditation, no caffeine before 10 a.m., biohacking—it’s easy to feel like there’s always something we should be doing to optimize our well-being. The irony, of course, is watching people film themselves doing yoga by a lake—and then before you know it, you’ve lost 2 hours on your couch (I’m guilty of this).

But my friend’s comment hit me differently.

I’ve sometimes felt lonely in the city where I live. I’ve imagined everyone else out there, connecting, socializing, doing something meaningful. I thought the cure for loneliness was being around people. But here, miles away from the noise, I felt the opposite. The idea that I could feel less lonely by being alone was a revelation.

When Sunshine Doesn’t Feel Like a Mood Booster

Not everyone feels an instant surge of happiness when the sun comes out. Why isn’t the vitamin D making me feel elated? Why am I not instantly happy? (I actually wrote about questioning your thoughts here.) It can be frustrating to accept that just because the weather shifts, our mood doesn’t always follow suit.

While sunlight is often linked to improved mood—primarily due to its role in vitamin D production and serotonin regulation—the relationship between weather and mental health is more complex. A 2020 study published in the Journal of Affective Disorders found that seasonal mood changes vary significantly between individuals, and factors like pre-existing mental health conditions, sleep patterns, and personal associations with certain seasons all play a role. Some people feel an uplift in summer, while others experience summer-onset seasonal affective disorder (SAD), which can bring anxiety, insomnia, and irritability instead of relief.

Finding Calm, Not Isolation

This moment with my friend made me re-evaluate my recent funk surrounding a low mood. I was attributing it to FOMO, but in fact (whilst my scrolling never helped) what I needed was some time AWAY from things.

I reassessed what loneliness actually means. It’s not just about being physically alone—it’s about disconnection. And sometimes, stepping away from the constant noise of city life and social media can help us reconnect in a way that a crowded bar or a buzzing group chat never could.

Nature doesn’t demand anything from us. There’s no pressure to perform, to be interesting, or to keep up appearances. Instead, it offers space—to breathe, to reflect, and to just be.

So if you’re feeling the weight of FOMO, social pressure, or seasonal shifts, maybe the answer isn’t chasing connection in all the usual places. Maybe it’s stepping away, even just for a moment, and letting solitude remind you that you’re never truly alone